Though it doesn’t take up any DVR space these days, I have watched my fair share of reality television in the past. From hiding in the basement to watch The Real World in 8th grade to watching season upon season of The Bachelor, I’ve been exposed to pretty much every reality TV character that exists.
And of course they’re characters. Producers have endless hours of footage to
manipulate edit into an interesting show. Nobody would watch it if they just showed a live feed. It’d be boring!
After endless discussions with friends and much thought, I’ve come to the conclusion that with 24/7 filming, I could play I wide array of characters. All an editor would have to do is choose a select few clips from each day and they would be set.
Over the course of 24 hours, I am…
Kind and Wholesome.
I was a Catholic school teacher, and at my heart, I am loving and kind. I send snail mail. I go to church. I support charities. Take a clip of me getting ready for church or reading a theological book, pepper in a clip or two of me chatting with a friend, being supportive, and show me writing a nice letter with some warm and fuzzy music in the background, and bam. The wholesome girl next door.
Completely Obnoxious and Explosive.
When I’m not being all wholesome-girl-next-door, I can be found yelling at my husband over groceries, nit-picking about the dishes in the sink (while ignoring my pile of dirty laundry on the floor) and muttering at other drivers under my breath. Just catch a clip or two of me at my worst, and you’d have plenty of footage to make everyone turn on me. Just like that, I could be the villain of the show, yelling at everyone over nothing at all.
Oh yes, I can be lazy. Just tonight, as the dog barked like a total maniac, I looked at Goose and said, “I think Brady needs to go out.” Apparently I was incapable of taking him. I will drive past the garbage cans at the curb, knowing Goose will bring them in when he gets home. I will abandon a meal that will take all of 15 minutes to prepare in favor of carryout. Sometimes, I am so damn lazy. A clip or two of me laying around on the couch, a shot of the clock as I sleep until 11:15 on a weekend, and a snippet showing me reminding everyone else what needs to be done while I sit around? You’ve got yourself the lazy one.
Catch me at the right moment, and I will cry over a Jif commercial. Enough said.
Yes, I did tear up when I looked that one up. I can’t help it. I love peanut butter and families. So apparently all producers would have to do is show me Jif commercials on repeat and then talk to me about what’s going on in the show. I’d be all blubbery and sad and the audience would have no idea that it was actually over peanut butter.
Follow me around with a camera all the time and you could make me anything. I just wonder what an editor would choose!
Which reality show character would you be?